Sunday, February 12, 2012

My God

It's been too long since I've added anything to this.  Too long since I really wrote anything I've liked.  I've fallen into a pattern of efficient life/time-wasting in Michigan.  I can't wait until I get home.  This place is robbing me of the thinly layered, already shaky sociability foundation I had created back home.  I am becoming more and more like the people I hate here, and it is mainly due to my utter lack of interest, my pure resentment to any social interaction here.  I can't bring myself to engage with any of the people I have met here because they lack something entirely essential that I need in people I can respect, and wish to associate with.  They lack self-awareness, humility, intelligence.  When I can't care enough to provide what I really need to make myself as effective a social entity as I can be - desire - then I come off as an idiot. 

That drives me crazy.

I want to put two poems on here, one from Dylan Thomas and one from Charles Bukowski (real stretch of creative influence and a strong representation of my interest in expanding my library of poets, I know) that have been in my mind the past couple months.  I will do that soon.  Maybe tomorrow.

For now, I must go to bed.

I'm glad to finally be back here though.

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